I, personally, have never bought into letting go of my “truly” loved ones. It simply doesn’t compute in my system. It is completely foreign to me. For one thing, a “truly” loved one is someone who is absolutely ingrained in my heart and soul. I don’t have many “truly” loved ones; however, I have people in my life who simply whirl in the windmills of my mind.
We live in a world of ‘the in between’. We often feel torn and out of sorts on many levels in our lives. In our spiritual paths we are often pulled in two directions at once. That of faith and doubt…they seem to work on us at different times in our lives, sometimes the struggle more intense than at others, and in the end one will win. If not on an intentional level, then in the way that we interpret our lives on a regular basis; in how we actually live out our values.
In our relationships with others the fear of loss or the eventual separation is often pushed beneath the surface. This can be a positive development, for it does allow us to have deep relationships with others and it keeps back the anxiety of the eventual death of all those we love and relate with.
Yet what would life be like without these deep relationships? True we may be spared the pain of loss, but we would also miss out on the joys and yes the sorrows of any relationship that is worthwhile. Perhaps those with so called “anxiety disorders’, are actually the ones who can’t forget how temporary everything is as well as how life can truly turn on a dime.
We seek love because I believe that is what we are made for. In Christianity, God is revealed as love, so our longing for loving and deep relationships can be looked upon as a sign post pointing towards what is of ultimate importance in our lives. Love is like the rain that makes a desert blossom, the love of God is what makes the soul alive. All relationships that are true and loving I feel point to the reality of God’s love for each of us.
Br. Mark Dohle, OCSO
Holy Spirit Monastery
