Solitude is experienced differently than simply being alone, or feeling lonely, or of course isolation, which is I suppose the opposite of solitude. The ability to be alone before God, to simply be in the Eternals presence has to be grown into, a slow movement into the depths of the mystery of existence. Boredom often keeps some from solitude, I know it does me at times, though as I get older this seems to be lessening. Below the feeling of deadness that can come from being alone, lies for many, and also for me, anxiety. The fear perhaps of being seen, or known by the other. So ‘projects’ are sought after, good in themselves, but in the end, a way to simply not allow God’s gaze to rest on our inmost being.
I have learned that no matter what has to be faced, dealt with, named, etc., God is already waiting there for us, and when that happens a feeling of arriving home can surface, where the whole texture of reality changes and one is at peace.
So patients is needed towards oneself when trying to enter more deeply into solitude. Also, each will experience it differently, the ebb and flow of that ability will change, but we always move forward, if our hearts desire is to grow in our love and trust in God.
Br. Mark Dohle, OCSO
Holy Spirit Monastery
